I went to the doctors yesterday. I wanted to talk to him about my plans about becoming a mom. So i made a appointment for a physical (i never had one before so i figured it was high time to) so i can get my foot in the door to ask him some questions.
The place i want to go to get the (TDI) makes you have a referral from a doctor so i figured i'll just ask mine. I have been seeing the same doctor for over 15 years, he should understand my wants and needs....
About the time i set foot into the examination room it was a nightmare. at first he was asking the normal questions, do you drink/smoke. have you ever had surgery ect. then the other questions came. are you on the pill? No. have you ever been on the pill? No. are you sexually active? No. that's when he looked at me funny then said. Have you ever had sex? i looked at the ground and said no. well he thought it was the funnest thing in the world. he said straight out he has never meet someone my age that is still has not had sex. let me tell you all during the examination he was cracking jokes left and right. he did not even do the full examination because he said and i quote "well there is no point since you never had sex..." Now wait a sec, just because i never had, I'm pretty sure i still need that. there are other things that could go wrong.
so after he cracked all of his jokes i was left in the situation on do i really want to ask him to refer me to the clinic. so i told him straight out my plan. I'm 30 and i want a baby. can you help me out and refer me to this place. he took out his prescription pad and looked at me. "well i can prescribe you a man what do you want him to look like..." My doctor, the guy i trusted for so long was making fun of my dream. you don't know how devastated i was. i told him i was trying to be serious. he stooped it with the jokes for a bit to get all the information about the clinic so he can contact them. but the jokes started up once again when he said that "Wow that is expensive, you sure you don't want that prescription?"
i left fast from the doctors office and went to my car and balled my eyes out. how can someone be so insensitive? and he is a bloody doctor, are they not suppose to be professional?
at lest he said that he was going to contact them for me so i least i did not leave empty handed. i just wish he did not have to belittle me in the process.
WALKING!!
14 years ago
Doctors can be absolute pricks. I still think the best course of action is to find a new (possibly female) doctor who will be more sympathetic to your plight. In fact, a Nurse Practitioner might be the way to go, but who knows. You will need a good gyno/ob but maybe the fertility clinic can refer you to one. Who knows.
ReplyDeleteThat's terrible! He should be ashamed of himself. I agree with Azaera. Get a new doctor. And FYI, you aren't the only person who hasn't had sex at 30. I won't go into specifics since I don't blog under a pseudonym, but I do know someone who was in the same sort of situation you are in. They ended up married with kids of their own. It just took longer to get started. And I also know a lot of people who wished they'd waited longer to become sexually active. We live in a culture that glamourizes promiscuity, but that doesn't mean that you should be made fun of because you haven't chosen that route.
ReplyDeleteDo what is right for you. If that means taking a more active interest in meeting potential mates, then that's fine. Life with a partner (the right partner) can be a lot of fun. But if what's right for you means deciding to have a baby on your own, then that's fine, too. It's a far better choice than a lot of folks make.